Photography by Elene
Introspection is a good thing, no? Last night I was told that every 100 years there’s a fresh batch of people on the Earth. Now, except for the mind-boggling few smoking & whiskey-drinking folks who somehow make it to 120, that’s pretty much true. So a question was posed to me. Why? Why do we make a, 1st, conscience decision to have a relationship with someone, not just girlfriends, wives, husbands, whatever, but also parents, your kids, friends, everything. Why do we do it? And 2nd, why do we work to keep them?
The easy answer is the animalistic one, no? It’s about survival, whether it be through genetics or through memories or or the scars we leave behind (good & bad ones), we want to make or leave a mark behind, it’s a formal of, well, not immortality, but certainly stretches our own brief existence out a bit further.
The other, also kinda mechanical, is our sense of duty. We have kids, we feel like we are supposed to stay around and raise them. We have parents, we feel compelled to “honour” them. We have friends and when a history exists, even when it’s not necessarily a good friendship anymore, duty compels you to keep going or give it another try orbe there for him/her at a time of need.
That makes sense and all, but what about beyond our instincts & duty? Why do I, for example, chose to maintain a relationship with my mom, but not with my dad? It’s not ALL good times with my mom. It’s not ALL good times with anyone, that’s not reality. Is there a scale? When the bad times outweigh the good times, is that when you bail on a job or an acquaintance? When the bad times are 2x the good times, is that when you drop the girlfriend or buddy? When the bad times hit 3x the good times, is that when family (not your kids) get dropped, but with a lifeline for redemption and recovery? And then with kids the scale is broke and no matter how bad the bad times are, you never drop ’em?
It’s interesting. I don’t know the answer why I keep the relationships I do. If I said for the love reciprocation, that wouldn’t be true as some relationships don’t give you the love you crave, but I don’t bail on ’em. It’s not about “passing my legacy” on or anything. Maybe it’s as simple as companionship? But again, the kid thing isn’t about that is it? We don’t have kids because we want another person around, do we?
I also don’t know “when”.. Sure, some you are born with and others are born into it (that goes back more to the “why” question), but say with Baby, “when” did I decide I’m going to stick with her? Not really sure. Sure, the easy answer to when & why is because she is the perfect woman for me, understands me, makes me happy emotionally, mentally, physically, and sexy-awesome-good-timesly, but what if she couldn’t anymore, say, she was in a car wreck and not able to do any of that, I don’t leave then, do I? Why not?
Because I love her. Well, yeah! Of course! But, the digger you deep, what does THAT even mean?
I guess the answer for me then to the “why” & “when” is love. I love my daughters, I love Baby, I love my mom, my sis, I love my friends. There are different kinds of love, I love Baby different then I love my cycling buddy — otherwise, man, that’d make for some awwwwwkward bike rides, eh? — but when the switch is turn on, no matter the lighting type or the wattage or the room it’s in, I guess THAT’S when I’m in the thick of it.
Huh. That was interesting. Thanks for helping me figure that out! Nothing like a bit of introspective vomiting to clear the metaphorical stomach, eh? Speaking of introspective, the soundtrack for all that up there? Well, it’s none other than Down The Way by Angus & Julia Stone!
This time, we got ourselves an Aussie brother & sister duo creating, what can only be described, as lovely, chill-out, introspective folk/pop (of course). Yeah, this isn’t “happy music”, but that’s okay. It’s that kind of music that “gets you thinkin'” (obviously). I love the exchanging male-to-female vocals, the quietness, the downtempo, just hitting the spot on a heavy-thinking kinda-morning.
1. Hold On
2. Black Crow
3. For You
4. Big Jet Plane
5. Santa Monica Dream
6. Yellow Brick Road
7. And The Boys
8. On The Road
9. Walk It Off
11. Draw Your Swords
12. I’m Not Yours
13. The Devil’s Tears